More Flea Market Photos

Not your normal rabbit holding a carrot. My precious.

World's crappiest tourist trap souvenir. Poorly spray painted star fish exoskeleton, glued down plastic flamingo and palm tree, and shellacked sea shells all embedded in some color swirled sandy resin base. Really, who bought this the first time?

Does it remind you of the beach or some dust collecting crap where spiders live?

Five dollar freaking scary doll. Hair plugs and Jack Nicholson eyebrows; all she's missing is an axe and the reek of booze.

Lloyd: What will you be drinking, sir?

Jack Torrance: Hair of the dog that bit me, Lloyd.

Flea Market Photos - Salt and Pepper Bovines

Well, after that last heavy, preachy post, I thought you might like some humorous salt and pepper bovines. In the last pic you can tell that the green shirt one is the cow and the black vest is the bull. Like all great cartoon character and humorously anthropomorphized animals before them, they wear tops but no bottoms. I don't really know why I find this so funny; my wife thinks I need therapy.

Enjoy Some Flea Market Photos - VIII

I really can't stand Ann Geddes' so called art, babies with flower petal hoodies and other babies as seemingly random vegetable matter. This one is a baby kitten doll in her style; isn't that cute...ralph.
So it's a baby wearing a donkey outfit next to a teddy bear wearing a camper's outfit sitting on a plate in a picnic basket. I'm not hungry anymore...


I know this one may not initially look all that odd or offensive. Two sculpted faces (in the style of the 80s) looking hopefully to the future. However, consider that the sculpture is made of leather. That's right; not one leather face but two. It's even creepier to touch; believe me.

This one is not so weird, but in a previous post, I pointed out wastes of resin castings. It is missing Beethoven in the mix.

Enjoy Some Flea Market Photos - VII

Since when do clowns belong in baseball? Rodeos sure, but not baseball. I hate clowns. Although Bobcat Goldthwait did make a funny clown movie once (Shakes the Clown), but that hardly makes up for the fact that clowns suck. They're never funny or cute or wanted at parties.

Brass monkeys those funky monkeys...

Help me robot angel! Do robot angels dream of collecting little kids gold teeth?
Brass angel? Why not gold or silver? Brass is for monkeys and saxophones.

Enjoy Some Flea Market Photos - VI

Okay, at first I was "Ohh weird, pain killer cookbook" then I was, "Eww, creepy, that child is too happy about something," then I was, "Aww, that's sad. Why is he happy and hungry?"
That a whole lot of emotion for one cookbook. Then I thought, if you are poor enough that you need recipes to ease hunger pangs, then perhaps you should not be spending money on a cookbook. Instead, spend that money on some more food. I wonder how many copies it sold?

I have joked for years with my wife that I was going to start collecting salt and pepper shakers; I may start with these...

Enjoy Some Flea Market Photos - V

Dolphin or Whale and Butterflies

Okay, they're whales. Really, they don't look anything like dolphins. Anything.
"Hey, I calls 'em like I sees 'em! I'm a whale biologist."
And if you don't get that quote, you should watch more Futurama!
Butterfly Ball. Do they do this in nature?

Okay,... Ball Cluster. That's all I'm saying. Ball Cluster. Do people really buy ball clusters of butterflies? What a waste of resin. We could have used a few more thousand resin frogs, or birds, or clowns, or little girls with umbrellas, or wolves, or Beethovens.

Enjoy Some Flea Market Photos - IV

This one deserves a post unto itself. I did not stage this; I innocently walked around the corner and there it was. Either someone has the same sick sense of humor that I do, other booth owner thought that might be a good way to keep dust out of the doll head's hair.

Typically a cloche (bell jar), covers garden plants planted in early spring from cold weather and surprise frosts. The first use of bell jars (in the West) is attributed to the French; ironically enough they are also well-known as doll makers.

Also the title of Sylvia Plath's only novel, the bell jar is the metaphor she uses to describe her mental illness. She is trapped in a bell jar and can't breath. Ironically, depriving herself of breathable air is how she finally committed suicide. She sealed up the kitchen with wet towels under the doors and gassed herself in the open oven.

I shall name this doll head, Sylvia Lackabottom. Say hello, Sylvia.
"Mmph, emphy bodmphy...."

Enjoy Some Flea Market Photos - III

Here are some more great (blech) finds. If you didn't believe that fact is worse than fiction take a gander at these. Happy misshapen head clown - he's not really happy, it's just that he likes kids - a little too much...


and black velvet clown not as kitschy as Elvis or dogs playing poker and somewhat evil looking like Sideshow Bob (from the Simpsons). I must say the execution of the painting was surprising good, but the subject matter is straight from a sub-par cranked-out (not the drug - something quickly done to capitalize on your fame to make money before your fame dies and not concentrating on the originality or the quality of the story line), Stephen King novel. Ta-da...

Enjoy Some Flea Market Photos - II

More pic of things that will never sell. A different day, a different Flea market... more weird stuff. A copper can, with mirrors and a cow skull hot glued on it. And I don't even know what that blue crap is...
Does this one remind you of a song? Perhaps, a song by the untalented girlfriend of a dead talented grung rock star? Maybe a song by a drug thinned, bleached blond that only became famous after screwing the aforementioned grung rock star? Not coming to you? I bet she doesn't smell like teen spirit...

Enjoy Some Flea Market Photos

Okay, so there we were walking along looking at crap and there was this baby doll on a shelf (I don't think I need to mention what is wrong with it). And then I saw this rug on the floor, and I just couldn't take it...

I hope you are as freaked out as I was; art is objective.